Going through break up? I feel you. I understand you.

Let me walk you through the brighter side of the bridge

“But you’d said, you’re here to stay,” I said.

“I know, I know. I’d love to be with you. Heck, I love you,” he said, “But, right now. My career isn’t going anywhere. I seriously can’t be with you. I don’t deserve you. You deserve much better, baby… you deserve the world.”

“You are my world” I wanted to say. However, my eyes, my face gave it away. I knew. He knew. We stood there. He, looking away into the horizon, I sobbing on his white shirt.

There it was…. The end.

That morning gave me a weird sickness when he started sounding a bit different- when he started behaving a bit weird. Every inch in me was telling me, that it’s time. That it’s time up.

When he broke things to me, it was as though the bus ran from above me. I could not believe it. I would not believe it. Heck, I didn’t even want to believe it.

That evening and countless other following that, I remain shaken, shocked, broken and numb.

I have always been this hopeless romantic. I’m always filled with love and believed (and still believe) that love makes you larger than life. It spins your world…even faster than the axis of the earth. It makes time an empty entity. Love is selfless and accepts all. Doesn’t it?

That’s how I’d treated this love. Casual dating has never been an option. But he wanted it all light. Hence, moved on.

And if you are reading this, I am 98% sure that, you must have gone through something like this. A bit differently, but you must have felt all the same.

So, I want to tell you that… You are not alone. I am here with you.

No. You don’t have to stand back up in a heartbeat.

No. You don’t have to move on just yet.

No. You aren’t crazy to feel this way.

Honey, you were in love and that’s always beautiful. This love is yours and completely real, even if the person wasn’t playing a part in it.

No. You don’t have to go looking for the right person just yet.

No. You don’t necessarily have to throw yourself into cigarettes and alcohol (I tried this, honestly, not a good option).

No, You don’t have to run into the mouths of other people (Oh please, don’t do this).

No. You don’t need a rebound. Don’t even force yourself into believing it. Don’t download some stupid dating app. You’ll end up confused and even more miserable.

The list of no’s can be longer.

However, if you really steer your perception to a bit northward, things would really get better. Here’s how…

First things first. Stop talking and stalking (to) them. Honestly. There are many interesting things that you can do with your time. And by the way, just a reminder, life is short.

Of course, cry. SCREAM. And BAWL even. But make it your thing. If they left you mercilessly, then they don’t have a right to see this side of yours.

Believe me, no revenge is better than giving no fucks at all. Only in this case, you have to fake it till you make it. Meanwhile, faith it.

You will feel weak in the beginning. But, you’d be filled with awe and gratitude when the immense strength will wash you over.

You are broken. Put yourself back up. But differently.

So whether it is love or profession or passion or anything that it is you seek. If you are denied to it, you are actually turned to making a better version of yourself. So you desire and deserve better. It means it is time to reinvent yourself and discover something new in you.

For this, you need to open up. Open your eyes, heart, mind and soul and let them guide you.

No, I am not diving into spiritual content. I am going to make it easier for you.

Open your eyes:

Look around. It’s the end of a relationship. Not the end of life. So stop wallowing in the pain.

There are many things more valuable than them (because clearly, had they been, they would have been with you now). There is more precious love than the love of the lover. Seek warmth in family. Seek warmth in friends. Seek warmth in you (Also, seek warmth in FOOD :P).

Open your heart:

Listen to yourself. Take a day off. See your parents and best friends. Spend time with them and celebrate (after all a bag of trash has already taken themselves out of your life!). Life is all about fun times, laughter and celebrations. So hit of the music or if possible hit on the road. And oh, don’t forget the good food!!!

Remain patient with yourself. Always. You are going to miss them, think about them. But every day, you have to remind yourself of something better. Something that’s only about you. Every day, you have to love yourself more.

You can do this by indulging into a hobby or maybe have a new hobby altogether.

Open your mind:

Okay, don’t think of dying or attempting suicide. That’s ridiculous. Often after the breakup, people lose their sense of themselves. Don’t be people, re-engineer your mind.

Stop looking yourself from their eyes. Throw out their opinion about you.

They said you’re good at something, forget that, become the best.

They said you’re not good at something. Well, does that even matter? Fuck that!

However, don’t hunt on their opinions. Whenever they pop-up, analyse it and discard them.

Open your soul:

It simply means, experience it and grow through it in the most positive way possible. Set yourself free and throw yourself into new experiences.

Smile because it happened, instead of crying because it went away.

Meditate daily. Break up or not, this should be the must.

Don’t try to return to your older self. Instead, embrace whatever you have and make new. Your old self was in past. You are in now and going ahead into tomorrow. You are supposed to be new. You have to be new. This break up was only a medium to bring you here. So that you can become someone you are destined to. Make sure to become the best possible version of yourself. Make sure you make your dreams come true. No matter what NEVER GIVE UP ON YOURSELF.

No, this may not be easy but, surely will be worth it. So, go out, talk to people and seek the help of a therapist if need be. Also, It is okay to be weird (Read: It’s wonderful to be weird). And just in case, if you find someone who’s worth your time, cling on to them and don’t confuse it with “REBOUND”.

Lastly, take your time. Give yourself time. It is okay. This is your life. This is your time.

Remember that, thousands of people would soak on the surface of your warmth and call it love. But only a rare would have the courage to dive into the deepest corner of your soul and be with you (and yet keep diving in love).

love is never casual and nobody would ever put themselves in the position of losing something they really love. Period.

Been through a breakup? Going through a breakup? However it may be, I care. So, tell me, how are you feeling?